Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma - which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow know what you truly want to become. Steve Jobs
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You've changed. You're changing. You think you're onto something huge, but your old self is an anchor trying to pull you back down. You can feel the breakthrough right at your fingertips when out of nowhere old fears and beliefs fill your head, slowing you down. Maybe they stop you in your tracks. Suddenly you've taken two giant steps forward and ten steps back.
Oh, I've been there - more often than I'd like to admit. The core beliefs of our past can be buried so deep within us that we don't realize they're still there. Our old selves aren't necessarily "bad." Let's not put that out there. They just haven't grown to where we are or want to be. Old beliefs don't necessarily serve us going forward.
If you have chosen the journey of positive personal growth, I applaud you. It is not an easy path. Of course, choosing negative personal growth isn't easy, either. Positive change requires us to look deep within ourselves. We summon the courage to see ourselves for who we really are, identify who we want to become, and get to work making it happen. It's a lifelong process. Once you've made progress, you realize it's something you'll always be doing because you want to do it. We are dynamic creatures. If we aren't growing forward, we're either digging our heels in the sand or regressing.
Negative personal growth, on the other hand, doesn't require looking inward. It looks outward. It points fingers of blame at anyone and anything else in any situation. As long as the finger isn't pointing at ourselves, we're good. Or so we think. It becomes familiar. We surround ourselves with people who do the same things and support us in this vilifying approach to life. We surround ourselves with people who point fingers at us (either to our faces or behind our backs) instead of looking at themselves. The way we feel about ourselves tanks with each pointed finger. We self-doubt, self-loath, and self-deprecate. Negativity spreads like wildfire. It's a virus within ourselves. Unchecked, it begins to take over every aspect of our lives. With this approach it's hard to ever imagine really, truly being happy or fulfilled. It's hard to imagine living out our dreams and making a positive impact on the world.
Positive and negative. Both are hard. So choose your hard, right?
Every single one of you is capable of change and growth. No one is exempt. The catch? It's a CHOICE. Positive change. Negative change. It's all a choice...and whether you realize it or not, you've already made one.
Take stock of where you are in your life. Is it where you want to be right now? Is it where you want to be in 10 years? If the answer to either question is no, why? Then keep reading as I give you a first step to positive change. Give yourself grace as you do this, because you are acknowledging something many are too scared or unwilling to do.
Know that negativity isn't all bad. It's a great barometer. It shows you what you might need to work on. It helps you question why you have sudden, intense reactions to things that don't necessarily make sense. It helps you hone your closest inner circle. Negativity can help you grow forward when you learn to properly acknowledge it. (Another post, perhaps?)
Making the switch from negative to positive is SCARY. Moving away from anything comfortable is inherently uncomfortable. Worse, obsessing over it in our heads can continue producing the same results instead of effecting change. We have to actually DO something about it.
Recently, when I realized I was still allowing limiting beliefs to stand in my way of helping others and continuing to improve myself, I came across Mel Robbin's 5 Second Rule. "At it's most basic level, the five second rule is a tool that helps you take action. It gets you out of your head and that's the secret, you've got to stop thinking and start living before the system in your head has a chance to stop you." (Rule explained in detail in this video)
Apply this to your life. I don't care where you apply it, as long as it's in a positive direction. One step at a time, allow yourself to live. Then check back in here. I'd love to hear from you. And as you move on from this post, remember you've already made a choice.
Is it the one you want to keep making?